My pavement of thoughts

Why women should never lead.

2009-04-18T21:20:00.000-07:00

AWARE president gives first media interview since appointment

SINGAPORE: President for women’s advocacy group, AWARE, said the organisation has lost its focus and has become too diversified.
ADVERTISEMENT

In an exclusive interview with Channel NewsAsia’s Talking Point on Saturday, the recently appointed president, Josie Lau, spoke on why she chose to run for her post.

"I was the last woman standing. And I felt that I had to pick up the baton, to run and to continue to lead this organisation that has been marred in controversies in the last one, two weeks," she said.

Without mincing her words, she said the group has lost its focus.

"What the new committee wants to do is that, like any good corporation, if you’ve diversified too much, consolidate. And as with any new committee, we know that resources are always limited, let’s take a look and review what’s done in the past that’s good, let’s keep (that), and what new ideas we have to bring on," said Ms Lau.

She stressed that while members may focus on different things, at the end of the day, they are all fighting a common cause.

Over the past three weeks, the saga between the new and the old guard has escalated into a war of words, with each side accusing the other of harbouring hidden agendas.

So the question everyone is asking is whether the two sides are able to reconcile their differences and move forward.

Ms Lau said that is one of the first tasks she is planning to work on. She wants to create an environment where all members can disagree in an agreeable manner.

But this could be easier said than done.

Dana Lam, former AWARE president, said: "What are we supposed to reconcile if we don’t know what you’re about? AWARE is not about whether we are for or against Christianity; AWARE is not about whether we are for or against homosexuality."

Veteran members are also concerned that the current saga may have damaged the group’s reputation.

Old and new members have petitioned for an extraordinary general meeting to call for a vote of no—confidence in the new exco. This will be held on May 2.

THe recent spate of events in AWARE, has raised eyebrows on many people, leaving many with questions and doubt of the organization skills and agendas. The cat-fight within these group of people is something that i would say ridiculous. As always on how i felt about female being a leader of a big group. I do agree that at times, women do fair better in certain areas such as multi-tasking, ensuring their staff under them is not ill-treated by other departments.

We should also not forget that, women are extremely good at gossiping, influencing each other and other peers into their personal emotional thinking. Many say men are creatures without a heart, however, in my humble opinion, i agree that in running a big organization, the person heading the front should be impartial, which explains the heartless and creature part. Ladies, please bring this cat fights to your own office, settle them, there and then. Stop hogging the front page of our papers. Such news over the past few days have been so boring, and show nothing except the bitching of the members bickering and disgruntlement against each other.

DBS should also just sack that employee whom ignore the policy they had laid for her, instead of just letting her off. Else more ladies like here would never understand the importance of work and greater good, but only remember that they are doing things for themselves.

For the first time in so many years, I really think that such headlines on the newspaper has been a waste of ink, paper, trees and time. Strait Times, i besiege you to change the headlines, to Ming Yi whom case I would deem more interesting then those scratches that the cats leave on each other backs.

Opening of another waiting

2009-04-13T06:42:00.000-07:00

100409 - waited for this day
110409 - felt cheated on this day
130409 - finally opened, but another waiting game.

HDB finally opened their url, for people like me to pay $10 just to wait for our queue number. Did out a spread sheet, complete with pics, cost, location and all other relevant information in selecting our house. Till 2 hrs later, i realize that HDB actually do provide a pdf format of things all in 1! It was like OMFG!

Went on trying to understand my one dimension mechanics as well as torque. With half a day flipping, googling, but to no avail. Gave up and watch sniper.

And the temptation of getting 70-200 f2.8 IS USM is just getting stronger. Like what many would say, absence make the heart fonder. Taking a brief look at my flickr set, i do really say i miss the moments created in 07 during the making/journey of NDP, where everything was about making a difference. I can see myself going thru the same enjoyable journey but a different feel. This time playing more of a mentor, than a student.

Sharing Do's and Don'ts, sharing ideas, encouraging creativity as well as pairing people up to learn some rules of the trades. And i'm really proud to say, i'm no longer the trigger happy me. I only managed to take max 40 pics for the first MCR. Gd or bad, i dunno, but i feel that now; i'm more willing to think before even raising my camera and press the trigger.

The most fulfilling part is that i'm able to walk around, with only 1 lens attached, and work from there.

Pics of NDP can be found here: www.flickr.com/photos/nigel_4ever

What I want.

2009-04-01T07:23:00.000-07:00

Was in a colleague's car on my way home, and we chatted. About the usual things, which ironically is about life and how to better improve. This is not a topic many would commit themselves into much less discuss in depth.

Question no 1.
What would you do if you have 10 million dollars?

Question no 2?
What would you do if you have 20 million dollars?

Question no 3?
What would you do if you are the richest man on Earth?

The first 2 question were very easy for me to answer as it carries a definite number. But WORLD RICHEST? That left me dumbfounded for quite some time? What can I do and what would I do?

If i really do have that amount of money, first on the list. I would really go print out useful books and distribute to those that really need and cherish them. Then I will open some fund, be it bursaries or what ever. Encourage education, is the only way to make Earth a better place. And mind you, it would not be educating people on very academic subjects, but character development.

OH ya, i forgot to add, if i really do have that amount of money, I would straight away get myself the holy trinity that Canon has to offer in its 2.8 series. Well, dreams are dreams, wishes are wishes. I can only motivate myself further and not spending much on other things to get myself and my gf something.

We talked about house, renovation, furniture, wedding banquet, ROM, Engagement ring, Wedding band, wedding pics.
And all these all require money. Guess i really to to strike a big TOTO, to settle all these financial problems. Not that I do not have sufficient, but I just need slightly more of what i have now to have something to cushion us if we fall.

That aside, I have been trying to tune myself up again from all the rust collected in the past year. Picking up some basics and eye for detail in photography again. Well its really again. Mastering flash, is something i aim to do and achieve. But I still suck in it big time.

On my checklist, I have
1) money
2) more money
3) peace
4) world peace
5) happiness
6) health

Simple? or is it all too complicated?

Fear.

2009-02-11T03:33:00.000-08:00

Fear. This word truly struck me today. First time in my life. I'm struck by the fear of reality this evening 1700Hrs.

Many people used to ask me,if i feared anything or afraid of anything. My answer was always a consistent "No.". Of course i'm not talking about are you afraid of ghost(s)/paranormal situations. But more towards, are you afraid of what you might be facing in future. This has never crossed my mind that fearing of the future would be something that would be able to have be dumbfounded for a minute or so.

Today, fear struck me as time comes increasingly nearer then expected. My plan for the next 1 yr 8 mths might have to be super compressed into 2-4 months. I have no idea even if i fast forward a video clip on a computer, would it be able to playback that fast.

I'd be honest, and say I've really taken almost everything for granted till just. And most importantly, I've taken Time, for granted. I can never forgive myself for the over-sight importance of time.

There is so many I should, i can think of now.
EG.
1) I should have applied for studying part time earlier.
2) I should have constantly upgraded myself in life skills
3) I should not have wasted so much money and time on games.
4) I should have loved my honey so much more
5) I should have not wasted time spent at night watching TV programs
6) I should have not wasted money on those fanciful things.
7) ...............................
.
.
.
.

and the list goes on. This is the first time I'm feeling remorseful for myself. And its terrible. I must agree that Singapore as a country is too much of a motherly place for anyone. Let them out and free those wings that what almost every Singaporean wants; and you will see them return with a crippled wing.
I have been blinded by the motherly way Singapore has been run. Till that i never really realized the importance of time.

I guess for now, I shall head on with what i can figure out the best. To bid my time till August 2010 is here. Doing everything with near perfection, considering what other better options i have till the day i find that i can stand up again. Else, i will only be another walking zombie, till the day of no tomorrow.

Please give me all the support, all the aid i need, whoever is above and around me. I need not only courage but also divine intervention to get the best scenario of now.

a long way ahead.

2008-12-06T08:18:00.000-08:00

Memories serve us for a life time. Be it good or negative.

History was rewritten yesterday, by 1 whom i would dare say change the entire mindset of legacies, with both his hands. He repackaged a place, that was out of sorts, into one that had bonds stronger than diamonds. He shined the place with his smiles and hugs, till it glowed brilliantly even in the dark.

But like the saying goes, "All good things have to come to and end" and "we would not cherish, what we have till they are gone". His time for the next higher appointment has come. The sending off party and ceremony were simple, but rich with feelings. Every single member of the team he once lead, hugged him with mounts of emotions. With some visible with tears brimming their eyes. He, was stifling all those emotions to himself. Enjoying and savoring, every bit of what every individual has put up for him.

Gifts of appreciation were distributed, words of thanks and gratitude were said, handshakes of best wishes were shook. All in lieu, in appreciation to his tremendous effort and contribution. Many said, this was perhaps the best, never to be bested, never to be used as a benchmark.

The quality of the entire ceremony to party, cheers to games, were of a new and higher standard. Songs were sang with feelings, which could be felt, sang with the hearts. I told him, this is the place u built. Hierarchy don't come in here and stop things from moving, instead, they aid the process. Thus giving great speed and efficiency. He smiled, and told me. All these would never be possible without you guys.

Once again, he stood in the middle of the entire tarmac. No one need to ask, to know whats going through his mind as well as what was he feeling. It was clearly written on his face.

Sihui, stayed on. He too enjoyed the last moments he had. Just 1 sentence, and that was it. That was the night he worked with a smile, with the load off his shoulder. That was the night, he knew, how much impact he had on people around him. Most importantly, that was the night, he knew he had already became a legend just like his boss.

Searching for the lost vision.

2008-12-02T06:29:00.000-08:00

Things were finally reaching the end of the dark tunnel. With my montages delivered, mounted on the wall, with the digital photo frame complete on it. It is great seeing that all our hard work has paid off. The montages look great, credits to Daniel Chan mali chan, Sihui and of cos me!

The pics were great too. Finally got a chance to look at big prints of my pics. There were awesome. In terms of composition, color, in every technical aspect, in every artistic way too. I bet if Sihui saw this, he would say: " =.=''' Like what sia.".

Boss was grinning ear to ear, when all were delivered and mounted onto the wall. Think I would really miss him. His encouraging words and energy in pushing every individual to another higher level. Could really see him reminiscing at the parade square, the MPH today. He just stood there in the middle, looking around, savoring the last of the place. The place he polished with great care till it shined. I bet across the years no one came this close in clinching the Best Unit. I mean there is of cos an era when we won the best unit, but that was really history, way behind us.

For a moment, I was lost, in thinking how the place would be run, how things would be changed. And a short sentence, that brought my vision clear; "This is gd, its 95% and perhaps we could fill up the walls beside the TV.". That was it. Doing that could mean that it would be my parting gift. But nevertheless, my lost vision was found, my goal is clear. Its only when I'm going to embark on the journey to complete the 5%.

on the delay....

2008-11-19T01:32:00.000-08:00

It’s been some time before I updated my blog with something. Had been very busy with preparation of exams, both for work and my own academic pursue. I had wanted to start a new post on “Shutter Speed” but till date. I have not even started with a single line on it yet.

The idea on the style of delivering the post out is in my head, but my hands are all tied up with work. I had been busy overlooking the making of a few montages, which soon would be printed on a very large scale. In fact one of the largest print sizes I can ever imagine. All this montages would be nailed, drilled to the wall of a room, to be viewed by visitors.

The feeling of letting everyone see the works, is simply breath-taking... Its just like a mini exhibition of my works and my fellow mates. The journey is coming to an end, with only one last montage to finish and let our boss vet it through, before we send it out for printing.

But all these comes with sacrifice... YS has been constanly complaining about me neglecting her, with my work usually ending at 2330. And i start from morning about 9am. Our anniversary is coming as well, and till date i have no idea on what to get for her. Which would be terrible >.< if she found out. Haha... Actually i do know what to get for her. Just that, i'm still not sure if that is what i would be giving her.

Aperture begins....

2008-09-30T02:33:00.000-07:00

Aperture, a word which would usually put shudders into many. However understanding it, would give you great insight on how to use it in various environments.

Aperture usually refers to the definition of how much light is able to enter through a hole. Saying that, applying it into photography aspect is about the same. In controlling aperture during shoots, we are limiting the amount of light to fall on the sensor. Therefore many would say a bigger aperture would bring forth a faster shutter speed.

I believe many new guys would be confused with terms, such as f-stop and aperture. To put it into simpler terms, it actually means that a small f stop number refers to a large aperture size. And a large f stop would translate to a small aperture size. In other words the relation between f stop and aperture is that they are inversely proportional.

The picture above illustrates the relationship of the aperture opening VS the f-stop number. Say example at f/1.4 you would get the largest aperture hole size, however, at f/8 the aperture size is way smaller.

By understanding how aperture is going to affect the pictures you are taking would open up more room for creativity as well as achieving certain effects. A very common term used in photography is 'bokeh' and another much talk about topic is ‘depth of field’. These two terms would be further explained in the post.

‘Bokeh’ – The poison to many wallets.

The word bokeh is derived from the Japanese word, boke ぼけ, and a noun form of bokeru; blurred or fuzzy.
In photography sense, it’s referred to the appearance of out-of-focus areas in an image produced by a camera lens in the region of shallow depth of field. I.E, usually the creamy looking blur you get for the background of the picture.
Achieving such an effect is relatively simple; all you need to do is to adjust your aperture or f stop to get the creamy blur effect. That is the reason why many people are getting their hands on prime lenses.

Why bokeh?

Bokeh is a very good effect to utilize when there are situations when photographers want to draw their viewers’ attention to the intended subject of their picture. This effect is so natural that it would automatically draw the eyes of viewers to the subject. Bokeh is also a very good medium in reducing distractions from the subject in the picture.

Achieving the best with Bokeh.

Always take note of the distance between the subject in the foreground and the blurred background, a nearer foreground with a further background would create the pop-out effect best.

In this example, the subject is the Man with the sword. I captured him at the following settings.

F-stop: f2
Focal length: 85mm
Looking at the Bokeh created behind him, the cars in the BG are blurred in almost a circular form. In my recollection, the cars were about 10-12metres away from the subject. And the Subject was about 1-2metres away from me. Thus creating such a bokeh in the picture.

What is Depth of Field?

Depth of Field, a.k.a “DOF”, is the area/distance span you want to have in sharp focus. As lens only focus at a single distance, sharpness of the picture would decrease gradually on the either side of the focused distance.

In both pictures, I was focusing on the digits 1650. However the distance that I stood from the focus point was different. The picture on the top most was shot almost directly with me standing below the time board. And the picture at the bottom was shot with me standing 2-3 meters back from the stop I took the left picture. Settings for both pictures were consistent, and as follows:
Focal Length: 150mm
F-stop: f2.8
Exposure: 1/80

There are many discussions on ‘Shallow DOF’ and ‘Larger DOF’. When I first started out, these two terms were always confusing me with the term Bokeh. Note that Bokeh, it is the creamy blur effect you would achieve in regions of the picture which is off focus, and DOF simply means, from the start point of the subject distance to the other end of the distance of the frame to be in sharp focus. In other words, DOF is a condition and Bokeh the effect that comes along with the condition.

Shallow and Large Depth of Field

There are in some circumstances when large or shallow DOF would be applied to bring the captured shot to its maximum potential.

For example,

In situations such as capturing landscapes when you want the entire shot to be in focus, a Large Depth of Field should be applied. “Large F stop number”.

In the landscape shot above, notice that there is no apparent blur in the infinity region; area around the horizon. This is due to using a small aperture. Settings as follows:

F-stop: f8
Focal length: 10mm

On the other hand when doing shots of insects in macro viewing, a shallow DOF would be applied, as that would efficiently bring the subject out of the background.
** I wished I have a picture to better illustrate the point over. However I do not owe a macro lens nor a close-up filter to capture what has been described above.

An opening chapter

2008-09-04T06:44:00.000-07:00

Every best seller book has to start with a page. And this is the start of my story; my life story. Not a very complete one, but one that starts from the day that i start recording.

Its interesting to see how things evolve around you and change. Characters, feelings, expressions and even thoughts. I've just recently read on a few of my friend's blog. All were interesting, well written. But throughout those posts, I've understand their plight. It could be just me that always analyze people's words. Thinking more of the sentence they said or written. Put it as my only defense mechanism that's inbuilt. Its through these analyzing that have saved me from many unforeseen, "foreseen" situations.

Life have been hectic for me... 2 weeks of course, 2 weeks of preparation for my up-coming tests, and with the audit near the corner, it does not contribute to any positive thoughts into my head. YS* said i have been giving myself too much pressure on myself. However for all that cost, i cannot afford to not do well in any of my tests in my academic journey in SIM. Every single grade and mark i gain, translate into a form of motivation to push myself to go and reach out even higher and further. Photography as usual is always in my mind. Dreaming of carrying my trusted camera out for shoots, bringing it out to see what others do not commonly see or percept. Even without the camera in my hands, my mind carries it around with me. Looking at angles that many may deem me as crazy. But who cares? Its the questioning about how things looks that matters. Perhaps, in my next post, i should share on my chain of thoughts on how i take pics? This could be potentially helpfull to newbies whom are still picking up photography. Or should i touch on Photoshop? Ain't a pro in it, but, played with it extensively for like 3 yrs? Let me consider.... Maybe, perhaps....